Jack...Rest in Peace

As I sit here trying to figure out the plethora of emotions have been racing through my mind all day I can't help but feel a little down. For the past long while my family has had two dogs. Jack and Molly. If I remember correctly, we received Jack my freshman year of college back in 2001. Molly was a very recent addition to our family when my mother randomly out of the blue wanted to adopt one of her sister's puppies before Mother's Day 2012. Jack has always been a character. We have had a number of pets in my life time, a number of dogs, a few cats, and a rabbit. But Jack was very special. He had this uncanny and rather humorous way he would try to stalk small animals. When he was a small pup I would watch him freeze like he'd just seen a ghost. I though at first that there was something medically wrong with him. But no. Jack wasn't sick. He instantly morphed into full blown predator mode. He hadn't seen a ghost he saw a squirrel. He would slowly creep near the animal in hopes that he would have a new trophy. Closer and closer he waited for the right time to pounce. He would normally get anywhere from 5-10 feet from the squirrel and then all at once it was like he had been shot out of a cannon. He would rocket to the unsuspecting victim trying to kill it and bring it back to the porch. It's really funny now because as many times as I saw him try to catch a squirrel, never once did I see him try to quit. I wish there was a time where he could comprehend English. I could see the scene now. I'd sit him down probably on the back porch swing the conversation would be like this:

CHIP: "What's wrong Jack? Why are you so out of breath dog?"
JACK: "I missed a damn squirrel again. I don't know what it is about those stupid things. I see one and it's like something comes over me and I just want to pounce like Super Dog and kill those stupid bastards. Damn it I wanna kill one of those bastards so bad. And I will. Damn it I will...roooof!"  
CHIP: "Jack don't you know that you have a collar on?"
JACK: "Yeah. I know. So what!"
CHIP: " So...your collar makes a jingle noise every time you move, scratch, and even breathe puppy. The squirrels can hear you coming with each step you make."
JACK: "Well dang. That shouldn't matter. I am bigger and more ferocious than those things will ever be. I'll get one next time...rooof!"

In his later years Jack wasn't the mad hater of squirrels that he used to be. There was a time a few years ago when we found out that Jack was actually allergic to flees and on top of that he had a very very dry skin. It was down hill from there. a little while later his days were spent bent over and scratching at his tail area. It would get so irritated that he would spend hours (and I mean hours) gnawing at himself. It was almost like it didn't matter how much skin he took off himself there was still something that was aggravating him that he would spend all day trying to get relief. We tried everything; hair cuts, creams, sprays, lotions...everything. But nothing seemed to help. My family and I had been dealing with his digging for a long time. He would yelp in pain most night...and many night he would keep us up...scratching, digging and yelping. It got to the point last night we put him in a spare bedroom and it wouldn't stop.

I drifted off to sleep about 4:30 this morning and when I woke up I called my Dad and got the sad news. My mother was at the vet and she was putting Jack to sleep.



Heartbreaking...but necessary.  Rest in Peace Jacky. I know God will let you catch as many of those damn squirrels as you want now.

Until next time Geek-Rockers,

THE POETIC GIGOLO




    

Wrestling Professionally...

What up Geek Rockers?,

       Things have been crazy lately in the world of the Poetic Gigolo. Since I last wrote I have been working as an Academic tutor at New River Community College. I must say that I absolutely love my job. As I look back on my work life since graduating from the Land of Milk & Honeys in 2011, the difference in job environments is like night and day. 

The night looked something like this:

Working for Community Services, I remember going into my work shift and feeling completely drained from the lack of being able to sleep during the day. I was regularly scheduled for the 12 hour shift from 8pm-8am usually on Monday nights and by 2 am I was ready to call it quits. No shift was ever the same. I could never get in a routine (with the exception of some mandatory chores) with the clients. One night could be smooth sailing and the next night I would be racing to the phone hoping that the 911 call didn't go through in hopes that I could calm a certain person down enough so that the voices in his head would quiet down enough for him to sleep. After giving medications at 8am I was supposed to get off at 8am and try to go home. That almost never happened. If it wasn't car trouble, or child trouble, for being late it was another co worker running on "CPT-Colored People Time". I would have to turn a 12 hour shift into a 12.5 or a 12.75 hour shift due to either motherly circumstance or in the case of another just downright laziness and unprofessional behavior...on a very consistent. I was worn out constantly with no sense of rest or recovery. It didn't help things that I was starting a third phase of liver treatment. Mad props to anyone who's ever had to do that while having a full time job. This guy barely handled it. There comes a time in everyone's life where you have to realize that no matter how hard you push yourself, no matter how hard you work, and no matter what kind of progress you make, you are human and you have limits. Limits with people, limits with things, limits on abilities, and talents. Humans have limits. Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on your perspective), reached my limit in almost every aspect of life after working with Community Services for 9 months. My breaking point came when I contemplated throwing myself down a flight of concrete stairs. As stupid as it sounds now, harming myself in that way felt like the only way I could get the relief I was looking for, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and most importantly physically...after seemingly a lifetime of having limits be the fine print definition of life what hurt the most was having to admit to the man in the mirror that I couldn't do what this job required.  I was in a way heartbroken because like Moses could relate to the Hebrews, I relate to people that live with disabilities. And the life of the clients I worked with/for were almost defined by disabilities. 

Thankfully after 6 long months, things started to change. I was finishing up the last few weeks of my liver treatment when I got a call from my old Community College. They were in need of an Embedded English tutor and they'd decided to see if I was interested. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? OF COURSE I'M INTERESTED! In the back of my mind my thoughts race through the logistics of it all: I am familiar with the campus. I know the faculty. I would be involved with material that I studied in college...and I am less than 7 miles from campus. Sign me up Scottie!...and once I got acquainted with the routine (YES! There is routine to this job and I can establish one!)...The day looks a little something like this:

I would be able to sleep through the night and be at work Tuesday and Thursday before 9:30 am. SLEEP!...CHECK! ROUTINE!...CHECK! I would make sure the computers were up and ready. It was my role to assist the students when writing papers. It was my job to help them tighten their writing skills with the end goal being that that their writing would be at a Freshmen Composition level. To make things even better, I realized that I had been in their shoes some 11 years before so it was very easy to relate to them. While I didn’t get to do much at first I found myself trying to stay busy. I’d do this by typing a Word file that had the notes from the lecture on it. They were then sent via email to the students. Although it wasn’t technically my responsibility to type out the notes for students, I found that this kept my mind busy when there weren’t papers to help with. After a while the professor saw what I was doing and appreciated my efforts…so I continued doing this for the rest of the semester. Being the “officially unofficial” note taker for class seemed to give me a sort of extra purpose and drive to want to be in class. And it did. Then something strange happed. I started seeing student behavior…and it was less than professional. There were very few people in class so you’d think that they would pay more attention to what was being said by the professor. But that was not the case. Almost the entire class was “secretly” on Facebook or browsing the internet or even holding conversations with someone outside of class through some sort of electronic message system. I tolerated it for a while but like I said before I have my limits. I sent what I consider a scathing email to the students and the professor asking/demanding that they (the students) ‘step their game up’ and pay more attention to class. This worked for the most part. I saw a significant improvement in behavior. Class seemed to settle down from there. Granted there were some students that passed…and others that didn’t. I did the best that I could to help the students but I realized that the grades they received were a reflection of the effort they individually put forth in class…

As spring gave way into the summer session I volunteered to tutor a developmental math class at night. Boy was that an adventure! I have often heard it said that ‘the things you truly know are the things that you can effectively teach’.  That phrase couldn’t have been truer than in that class. Naturally as an English minor in college I enjoyed writing papers, dissecting my native language and constructing sentences that became excellent expression of thought mixed with research through the correct use of vocabulary.  But this class seemed like the exact opposite. In my mind the exact opposite of expressive language is concrete (and not so concrete) numbers being manipulated to form a problem while you seek to find a concrete answer to the problem. That’s exactly what math class felt like. My job wasn’t to help students work with verbs, adjectives, adverbs, and commas to form sentences, but to read the concrete sentences interpret graphs and pictures to calculate information and hopefully come up with solid answers. And this was accomplished…s l o w l y. I noticed that my brain went through sort of rewiring process overtime. But I enjoyed knowing that after an adjustment period I did well at being a math tutor. What was more encouraging was the fact that both the math professor and the other math tutor were people from my past high school life…It has been a very interesting summer.    

I am looking forward to what the fall semester has in store. So tonight the summer officially comes to an end…but not without a bang. A bang you ask? What type of a bang? A professional wrestling bang. My friends Travis Lane, Robbie Viars, and I toasted goodbyes the summer of 2013 with a local professional wrestling show in Hillsville, VA. There we had the chance to root for the bad guys, boo the good guys and bear witness to a classic form of entertainment that we all three enjoy.   Here’s to ya Summer of ’13. 

The Poetic Gigolo & Ricky Morton of
The Rock-n-Roll Express

Until next time Geek Rockers,

THE POETIC GIGOLO

Canberries and other nonsense

What up Geek-Rockers,

So have you ever started watching a movie and get semi interested and then someone change the channel and then after that person leaves the room still find yourself interested in the movie so you buy it on pay-per-view to see how it all plays out? Well, I just did that exact same thing. I started flipping through the channels about 2 hours ago and saw Jennifer Aniston and Ben Affleck arguing. Jennifer wanted to get married and Ben didn't. To make a long story short, there were about three scenarios going on in the movie that all centered around love, marriage, commitment...call it what you will. It is a typical chick flick that leaves the view in the same old "...gosh I wish I had a boyfriend. What's wrong with me? I am so ugly. I will never find a husband. Dammit where is my ice cream?" type of mood.   Now I am left with the after effects...the quicksand and false hope of emotions. Even though I have all but vowed not to ever be married, I will admit that this time watching a movie like He's Not That Into You wasn't all that bad. I pointed out (in my head at least) the Hollywood spin on most things and cornered the emotional false hope that it gives pretty quick. That helped me to keep my heart between my rib cage pretty effectively....

...in other nonsense...

I recently started working at the community college I graduated from in 2005. I am working as what is called an "Educational Specialist". Don't be fooled Geek-Rockers. I am nothing more than a paid tutor. From January to May I worked in developmental English  trying to help students get their English writing style up to par so they could take Freshman Composition (affectionately referred to as English 111). To be perfectly honest I really do not know how effective I was as in embedded tutor. There were people there that could barely speak English and also people there that thought class attendance was optional or that they could show up to class whenever they wanted and still expect to pass. Some days waking up at Liberty and just getting to class was an accomplishment, let alone being attentive in class, following the lecture, and staying awake during it all. I will give the human race its due. There are and will be days where class attendance is not possible due to whatever circumstance. BUT YOU HAVE TO ATTEND CLASS. These are my personal ground rules:

1. The Early Bird Gets the Worm.-If the class starts at 8am it is your duty to be there no later than 7:45. A student that is consistently early to class can be counted on to at least be exposed to all of the in class lecture material. There were also some bonuses that can be give out in class. While this is not always the case there were a few times where the instructor would give us extra points on a quiz or test or he would tell us things about the exam that would only be exposed in class.

2. You Get What You Pay For-I understand that there will only be one Einstein but students should at least try to study like they are paying for each lecture out of pocket. If everyone was paying for their classes out of pocket I think one of two things would happen. Either there would be a lot less students in college (because of the lack of desire/funds, or failure (as in flunking out of school due to failing grades) would not or could not be an option. 

3. I am a Person not a Number.-This ground rule is simple. The professor is a person. You are a person. Get to know your professor. When you and your professor walk into class the first day you are just a name with a student number attached to it. The relationship is forged when you take the initiative to introduce yourself to them one on one. This can be done while they are in their office or after class. I had to so this because of test accommodations and because I wanted them to know that I am a person...not a number. 

I sound like I am giving a lecture to incoming freshmen. Nevertheless I digress. Back to the cranberries...

After watching the movie I was in the bathroom at my mom's house with the radio on...when all of the sudden this song comes on. (As a little side note the singer of The Cranberries is drop dead GO'jess). So like a true geek-rockin hopeless romantic love sick puppy I have seamlessly married the feelings that the movie produced with with feelings the song give me. Boy does it suck! While the song is great, the emotions that are flowing through my head and out through my fingers are nothing more than plastic, breakable, counterfeit and phony....Can't wait till this is over...

Until next time Geek-Rockers, ( Guard Your Heart and flee from chick flicks)

THE POETIC GIGOLO 

New Blog New Perspective

Hello Geek-Rockers,

        It’s the Poetic Gigolo ‘back in the saddle again’ as one rock band puts it. I want to start off this new means of communication by explaining the title. I first got into blogging through a potential g/f, turned friend, turned acquaintance, turned out to not be what I expected. I enjoyed it at first but soon I realized that I was just doing it for her. If I would have been smart and reviewed my personal history with the opposite sex, I should have known that this venture wouldn’t work no matter how much effort I put into it (*or didn’t put into it from her perspective*). All I will say on that front is the fact that I should have listened to Ace of Base and taken their advice. I will give the devil his due. Sometimes opposites attract and the relationship that is formed can work for the better. But sometimes (most of the time for me), that is not the case. In any event, I have learned the hard way that both sides need to commit to at least communicating with each other for it to work. (A one sided relationship is NOT a relationship.) +It might be a crush, an infatuation, it might be a potential stalking situation, but it is not a relationship.+ This communication should become a rule that both parties practice. And that rule is “…assumption of feelings is never practiced…” That is to say that both parties should never assume that the other person knows how they feel. Additionally, regardless of how much heat there is on one end, the venting of emotions should NEVER EVER EEEEVER be posted on a public blog for the world to read. The following Book of Weezer verses are a product of that experience:

“By the same token, Facebook and blogs are NO PLACE to air grievance you have with any person. You may find it emotionally satisfying to vent, but instead of taking to cyberspace, use a word processor or pen and pencil or a chalkboard to deal with your disagreements or angers. By posting your complaints about people on social media, the business between two people becomes the business of your other family, your friends, your acquaintances, your co-workers, people you see at church, people you met on the street, friends of friends, friends of friend’s friends and ultimately strangers. If arguments are initially between you and another person, your other family, your friends, your acquaintances, your co-workers, people you see at church, people you met on the street, friends of friends, friends of friend’s friends and ultimately strangers have no business knowing (and forming their own opinion) about what went down. Stop making it their business!”-The Book of Weezer 11:6-8

Now to the meat of this blog…new perspective. For as long as I could remember I have been fond of certain books. If you were to venture into my bedroom you would see a book shelf full of wrestling autobiographies, stories, religious literature, and even text books from my days in “The Land of Milk & Honeys” (The nickname is meant to be a spoof of Old Testament land of Canaan). I have many books in my library and have read most of them. But here recently something has changed my mind
about reading conventional book. That something is the 4^th Generation IPod Touch. I was given my IPod Tough by my brother who as upgrading to the IPhone 5. After converting everything he had from his IPod to his new phone, he no longer needed his IPod.
      

After receiving his IPod the only thing I knew I wanted to do with it is download the WWE app. This is MUST HAVE for any wrestling fan watching Monday Night Raw because through the app you can watch matches while the show is in a commercial break. **very very cool**. After a while I realized that I could have Facebook, Twitter, and other aps at my fingertips (given the proper internet connection). One thing that I was unaware of was the fact that if you have an IPod that you can actually save and read books with it. This was particularly exciting because a new professional wrestling autobiography had been released a few months before and the IPod gave me a *cheaper* reason to test out my reading experience. (*This may not be the case for every single title but that is the general consensus*) (You may have to download an app to read books, like the Kindle app or the Barnes and Noble app depending on where you buy your e-book from. I have the Kindle app on my IPod.)

 

        I downloaded the Kindle version of Booker T. Huffman’s book “From Prison to Promise-Life Before The Squared Circle”. In short, this book has given me a new perspective on Booker T not only as a wrestler but also as a human being. I never would have known that he grew up in the slums of Houston Texan and had to basically not live but learn how to survive at a very young age. It’s also shed some light on his early Harlem Heat tag team persona. I thought that I was just watching a so called “brother tag team”, but as it turns out, the two men that were the Harlem Heat are actually full blood brothers. Interesting! I highly recommend the book to anyone but especially to all my ‘rasslin fans out there.

        What made reading this book especially enjoyable for me was reading it on the IPod. Years ago when I was compiling my library, I thought and even stated to friends that I preferred having the actual book over an electronic version. Looking back I think it was because I had never read anything on a portable electronic device. There are a few very distinct advantages to reading books on an electronic device:

Reading a book on a device like the IPod or IPhone limits your visual attention.- What I mean by this is that when reading with the IPod you can only see the words that are displayed on that particular page. I have often found that while reading normal books, I would get distracted by the number of pages I had left to read in a chapter. Subsequently, I’d see how much I had left to finish a chapter and put it down because I had “so much more to read” in order to get to a new idea or thought in the next chapter.  With the IPod, I am not distracted by the upcoming pages because they aren’t in my field of view. Also with one simple touch of the screen I can see how many pages are left in the remaining chapter until the next chapter begins.

Electronic Dog-Earing and other features-Unless you are the reader that uses old school bookmarks, dog earring has been you main way of keeping up with the progress of your book. While this is a common practice, it doesn’t allow you to know exactly where you are on the page you dog eared. With the IPod you can not only dog ear pages you can also highlight and underline phrases that are important to you as the reader. The device also keeps track of all of your highlights, dog ears, underlines etc. Electronically dog earring pages can also be undone and not cause harm to your book. This is not the case with conventional books. Another cool feature of IPod readers is that readers can snap to the most recent place in the book with a simple push of a button. You can also see what parts of the book have been popular with other readers through a dotted line on a phrase, or paragraph. When highlighting passages of the book you have different color options to highlight with. You also have the option of turning on and off a cool little page turning animation that makes you feel as though you are actually turning a page  

Size By size I mean the size of the page. With conventional books size of the page is dictated by the size of the entire book. With e-books you have features that allow you to manipulate the size of the font so that print is either bigger or smaller depending on preference. The number of pages (or page turns you do to get to another pages) depends on the size of font you desire.

Progress-With the book being digital, the app that you are using to read the book gives you a percentage as to how much you have read and by simple subtraction you can know how much of the book you have left to read. This is precise allowing you to know exactly where you are and how much you have until you finish the book.

Balance & Turning pages-Balancing a book in your hands while trying to keep your place and turn the page when necessary is not a big deal for 99% of people. However, for someone like me who has mild cerebral palsy, balancing a book while staying in the proper place has proven to be difficult. This is especially true with hard cover books that have a thicker spine than others. With the IPod the shape of traditional books is eliminated because the IPod becomes your book. The size of your book is no bigger than the IPod itself. There is no balancing involved and page turning consists of swiping your finger from the right side of the screen to the left. (*simple…and EASY*…geek tested & palsy approved)

Saving Space- This is simple. I can take my entire library with me and can fit it in any place my IPod fits. After reading using my IPod I wish I would have had this type of technology when I was starting to build the library pictured below:

In total I have read 2 book from cover to cover after receiving an Ipod. (Booker T: From Prison to Promise &  The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. Both books come highly recommended for different reasons. I am also in the process of reading Kyle Idleman’s Not A Fan: Becoming a Completely Committed Follower of Jesus. (I have linked the Kindle version from Amazon.com.) This is an extraordinary and eye opening read for American Christians and I would be lying to you if I said that it’s just another Christian book about “how to be a good Christian” a.k.a.-Joel Osteen. This book serves as the one that will definitely make you rethink your walk with Christ. It draws a very distinct ‘line in the sand’ and as redefined what it means for me to say that ‘I follow Jesus.’ I recommend it highly to all my fellow believers with one warning. The warning is this: DO NOT read this book if you aren’t ready to change. If you take this book seriously it will change your view of Christianity and make you reexamine all that you believe about Christ himself.

~Until Next Time Geek-Rockers~
~~~read read read~~~

THE POETIC GIGOLO